It’s Friday, which around here means one thing: MAGA losses of the week, and this batch is a doozy. We are joined by Cliff Schecter to laugh at the chaos, because sometimes, that’s all you can do.
A rally kid stole Trump’s thunder with what might be the greatest impromptu impression of him ever caught on camera. Jack Reacher himself, Alan Ritchson, declined to be his conservative fanbase’s hero. John Thune told the White House to get its own SAVE Act votes if it’s so easy. Mike Lindell, voter fraud’s loudest crusader, apparently couldn’t produce his own Minnesota registration until one mysteriously appeared mid-week. And Citizens Bank finally dropped its financing of GEO Group and CoreCivic after enough pressure campaigns piled up.
But it’s not all comedy. The Pentagon’s Iran casualty count quietly dropped from 18 to 14 overnight, with officials calling it a “data anomaly.” Uh huh, sure. Behind that missing number are real people like Sgt. Michael Swinton, whose widow says he just wanted to come home. Trump used his death to justify the war, and the Gold Star families are appalled—as are we. Meanwhile, Democratic officials are running drills for a stolen midterm, and Alaska just purged 3,000 voters over bad DMV data.
All of it lands at the Solemate Awards, where Sean Duffy defends his crown for gunning to rename Penn Station after his boss, Cynthia Lummis debuts with a crypto bill dressed up as an ethics defense, and Marco Rubio dodges a war crimes question hard enough to earn a permanent nomination. Find out who takes home the crown and licked Trump’s boot the cleanest in tonight’s episode.
